The Comeback Chronicles: In Search of Motivation

Well hello there, folks. Fancy meeting you here. If you’re reading this, then you’ve probably become accustomed to my weekly Comeback Chronicles, which detail my return to running, sport and fitness after falling and breaking my ankle in December last year.

 

However this week’s post is going to be slightly different, for two reasons. Firstly, I’ve been sick all week. Like, sick as a dog. Some Summer flu that’s been doing the rounds. Cue a week spent (mostly) in bed watching (mostly) House of Cards on Netflix. Secondly and as a consequence of this, I’ve taken a whole week off sport, running, fitness… you name it. That’s left me with plenty of time to think. And in case you were wondering, I hate spending time alone with my thoughts.

 

I’ve come to realise, perhaps more so than normally, that running really is a form of therapy for me. It sounds silly, but that rush of endorphins and movement of limbs really acts as a way for me to process whatever it is that’s going on for me at any given time. And currently, that’s quite a lot. I haven’t spoken about it before on here, but I’ve been having a really tough year. One morning in January, my Dad sat my Mum down and told her in no uncertain terms that he was leaving her. And then, just like that, he left. The divorce papers were signed by April, and finalised in June. And just like that, my family broke apart.

 

I’m not meaning to sound overdramatic here. But it’s just that your family unit is something you take for granted, and no matter how bad things get in your own life, your family is usually there in the background, ticking along as usual. Having that unit taken away from you is like having the ground fall away from under your feet. What was once a certainty is now a tangled mess, and there’s nothing you can do about it.

 

I bring this up because this is a time in my life where I really need to be able to run. When a situation is making you unhappy, there’s usually something to be done about it. But in this case, it’s simply a case of processing and accepting a whole host of changes, and letting it sink in. It’s like a loss, and in that sense I really need to be able to process. I don’t have a goal at the moment, and I could really use something to throw myself into. If it weren’t for my injury, I would almost certainly be training for a marathon right now. But alas, it wasn’t meant to be.

 

I feel like I need to recalibrate. I need a new goal – something to throw myself into entirely. A marathon is out of the question, but I need something to aim towards in the midst of all the chaos.

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18 thoughts on “The Comeback Chronicles: In Search of Motivation

  1. Sorry to hear this :-(. My parents split up 7 years ago, so I know exactly what you’re going through. It’s a difficult adjustment but just hang in there. It gets better.

    Maybe a good goal would be a run streak? The typical rule of thumb for run streaks is at least a mile per day. It could help you get back in the habit of regular running and provides something to work toward, so you can stay motivated and keep up with running without having to worry about training for a race. It’s a thought!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, that’s actually a really good idea! I’ve got this weird mental block at the moment about running outside – originally I was told to only run on the treadmill as it’s more stable and consistent for my ankle. But now I just can’t make myself run outside! So that’s actually a really good motivation!

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  2. Running is definitely therapy for me. I find the physical effort a way of dealing with emotions of frustration and anger as well as sadness and loss. My parents split up when I was very young so I’ve never known that strong family unit, however running has helped me deal with my own divorce as well as grief. Hope it helps you too x

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  3. Sorry for the stressors you are coping with. Running is therapeutic.

    Have you considered triathlon? I know you have a 1 mile swim coming up. Don’t know if you bike. A lot of triathletes come from a running background and move in that direction for cross training or due to injury (can still run, but not as much as desired). Training for 3 disciplines makes it a little overwhelming and can eat a lot of time. It allows for some running but doesn’t kill the ankle. I’ve dealt with a lot of chronic ankle issues and triathlon was a very good fit for me.

    Take care…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for your kind words. I think a triathlon could actually be the way to go. Very soon I’m moving house and i’ll be able to cycle into work, so that’s two out of three covered. I’ve been meaning to give triathlon a go for a while now, so I think it could be a good goal for me!

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  4. sorry that you are having such a tough year, the family stress can be overwhelming…maybe take a look at some other activities as Ray suggests…riding, rowing, explore some hiking maybe? try to keep your head up…often times we come out far stronger when we make it through the tough times…best

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  5. Aye, it’s a shitter for sure. Been lucky enough that it happened when I was 13.
    You will find ‘peace’ with it I hope. Glad to hear you use running as a therapy. I think we all do, to some extent. Some probably can’t/don’t know why though.
    Be well. Take care.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh that’s a really good idea, thank you! What kind of things do you think could work? I’m really struggling to think of things…! Maybe like a 50 day yoga streak, 50 day running, 50 day climbing… or something like that!

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      1. I’m doing a 100 day challenge in the Tough Girl Tribe – I’ve chosen at least 10 minutes of yoga or mobility work every day. Today is actually day 50 so we’re half way through. 10 minutes is achievable on busy days but when I have time I can do much more. It’s creating a really nice habit and helping with one of my goals for the year which was about committing to more yoga outside of my weekly classes. Whatever you choose, make sure it’s something you can fit into your day and won’t lead to you overdoing things. Others in the Tribe are doing things like a chapter of a book per day, mindfulness/meditation every day, listening to a podcast or watching a new TED talk every day. It’s all about picking something that adds value to your day and doesn’t need to be a massive commitment.
        Here’s the info if it helps:
        https://www.toughgirlchallenges.com/single-post/NEW-100-DAY-CHALLENGE

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Hi Pippa,

    Not being able to run when it gives you an escape from life’s sucker-punches must be an awful feeling. I do swordfighting, and a persistent hand injury took me out of the sport for over a year and I fell into a depression because that was my outlet for stress.

    In my article that you liked, I mentioned during my little soliloquy on the train tracks that I thought I could be running from something, but I could also be running TOWARD something. Do you find yourself running to escape the past, or to find the future?

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